IMAO has the transcript of career day with Bush, Rumsfeld, Daschle, and Buck the Marine.

"Now, Tom Daschle, why don't you tell the class what you do."

"Certainly. First of all, I would like to say how grateful I am for Buck's service in our military."

Buck stared at Daschle for a moment. "I don't think I like you."

"I get that a lot," Daschle said, laughing, "Anyway, children, I am a U.S. Senator. I help vote for what becomes our laws."

"You're a devil man!" screamed one child.

"Yes, I seem to radiate off sort of sinister vibe that young children pick up on," Daschle explained, "Commonly, babies cry when I come near. Most people, though, as they grow older no longer sense my evil so easily, and then may vote for me."

"My dad says you're a mean man who takes his money," said a little boy.

"I think that you're dad is just being selfish to try and keep his money. As a Senator, I'm better equipped to know how to spend people's money. And we'll be able to take even more money into our loving care if we Democrats can get a majority in 2004."

"Yeah, that will happen," Bush chuckled.

"It's not your turn, Mr. Bush," the teacher told him firmly, "Let Daschle speak. Now, Daschle, what does one have to do to become a Senator?"

"I think it's a good idea to first become a lawyer. That helps erode away your soul, which is an obstacle in politics. Then I say you need to act concerned about lots of things and talk down to people. And it's good to have a believable smile." Daschle then smiled, causing the class to cry.

"Make the scary man go away!" cried one girl.

(link via Joanne Jacobs)